Inspiration

15 Mar 08

I spent the morning very nervous, praying that this meeting today would not be a cause of upset to this fine family. I got my equipment together and tried to relax a little bit before I got going. I left home and headed over to the Providence College area of town toward the home - my meeting was scheduled for 2 PM and I was running on time. I got to my destination and found a parking space, took a deep breath, grabbed my equipment and headed for the porch. I took a moment before I rang the bell.

The door was answered by a pretty young lady wearing a high school sweatshirt. She looked to be about 16 or so, very polite, inviting me in. Cindy Day, the wife of DAC Michael J. Day, came walking toward me from down the hall. We greeted each other warmly and she said that she had some other visitors there that I may know. She led me to the kitchen, where Chris Janitto was standing with his two girls. Cindy introduced me to her daughter, Stephanie, who had answered the door and let me in. Chris introduced me to his girls, as well. They had stopped by to visit the Days during their travels. We all spent some time visiting for a little while and a short time later, we were joined by Michael, Cindy's son. Once Chris and his girls left, Cindy, Stephanie, Michael and I all sat down and we talked about the project. Cindy and Michael were familiar with the work I've been doing, but Stephanie wasn't. I didn't know how the rest of the family was going to react to what I was trying to do, but I wanted to give them the opportunity to decide whether or not they wanted to participate. Once everything was explained, Cindy and the kids began telling me the story of June 13, 2006.

I cannot fathom what these people went through that night. When Battalion Chief Ken Bock showed up at the house, Brianne, the Day's third child, went to answer the door, as Cindy was in the basement doing laundry. Brianne looked out the window, saw a Chief's vehicle and thought it was her father, Mike. She opened the door and there stood Ken, according to Cindy, white as a ghost, explaining that they had to go with him. Cindy, having been married for 22 years to Mike, knew that this was not good. Their youngest, Stephanie, was babysitting. Michael was at work. Their oldest daughter, Amanda, was away at school in Virginia. Ken told her not to worry about Michael and Stephanie - that he would have them picked up. Police officers were sent to pick them up. Cindy called them and let them know while they were en route to Rhode Island Hospital. Once she had called the kids, Cindy finally asked Ken if he could tell her what was going on. All Ken could say to her was, "he coded." Cindy knew that meant he had had a heart attack, but she wasn't expecting the worst.

They arrived at RI Hospital's ER and were rushing down the hall toward where a large group of chiefs and firefighters had gathered. Then Chief David Costa stopped her in the hall and asked her if she knew that Mike had been pronounced dead. Costa comforted the women for a few moments before escorting them into the room where Mike's body lay. While Cindy and Brianne began their grieving process, Michael was dropped off at the hospital by a Providence Police Officer. He went directly into the room and by his own account, just assumed that his father had a heart attack, but would be okay. He recounted that he didn't notice that the heart monitor, still hooked up to Mike's chest, was not actually on. He stood on one side of the gurney, reached across his father's body and took his mother's hands, telling her it would be okay, that Mike was strong.

"No, Michael," Cindy replied to her son, "it won't be okay. He's already gone."

Michael told me that just as he was about to completely "lose it", someone came in and said that "the other daughter" was there, meaning Stephanie, the youngest. The family rushed out to the hall, not wanting Stephanie to walk in until she had been told that Mike was already gone. They took her into a nearby sitting room and broke the news to her, then returned to the room where Mike was. After a while, Cindy walked out of the room and began seeing people from outside the department - civilians, family friends. She asked one woman how she knew and was told that Mike's name had been announced on the 10 PM news. Her thoughts immediately went to Amanada, who was in Virginia. She and Michael rushed outside to call her, but it was too late. Someone had already called to give their condolences. Cindy was devastated and furious that his name had been released before the family had been notified.

That was only the beginning of what was to come. Chief Costa and union President Paul Doughty worked together with the Day family to prepare a funeral for Mike with full departmental honors. It would be a difficult week for the family, but they had the support of an entire fire department and their blood relatives, as well. Firefighters did all of the work around the house - cooking, mowing the lawn - you name it, it got done. Battalion Chiefs chauffered the family around to get clothing and flowers for the funeral. They were never alone.

What is truly amazing about this family, to me, is the grace with which they dealt with this situation. Cindy was strong, elegant and realized that although she, her own children and their extended family were grieving, so were the firefighters. The people on duty at Washington Street Station that night worked on Mike themselves, trying desperately to save him. She knew that they would be devastated, as well - he was family to them. She told her children to try as hard as they could to be strong, that their fire family would be grieving, too. Stephanie volunteered to read a prayer during the funeral mass and Michael asked to give his father's eulogy. Whenever I mentioned not knowing where they got their strength from, they all had the same answer - Mike (or Dad). Mike was "the rock" of the family - their go-to guy. The children stepped up and did what they had seen their father do so many times before.

The hardest part of the entire thing for them? Again, their answer was the same across the board. Watching the firefighters and seeing the pain on their faces. That feeling of helplessness that they just cannot digest. Cindy added one more item to that - the firefighters' wives. She said that they each had that look of "my God, this could have been my husband". Cindy told me that she told every single one of them to hold on to their men - appreciate them now and do not take them for granted.

Once all of the ceremonies were done and Mike was laid to rest, the family finally set about their own grieving process. They still had all of the support that they needed, though. Ken Bock came to Cindy and asked her about the renovations that Mike had been in the middle of when he passed. He had gotten some of the work done on their home and was preparing to do some more. She explained what was left to do and Ken told her not to worry about it. He showed up that weekend with an army of firefighters. They ripped out walls, painted, built an island in the kitchen, did tile work, redid the basement - everything that Mike had intended to do was done.

There is so much more to this story and after talking with the family - for a full six hours, by the way - I have been moved, humbled and inspired by their strength. This family is truly amazing and I am honored to include their story in this film. Michael and Stephanie each want to film a segment for it - I'll be in touch with them soon for that. I could write for another two hours about all that they shared with me, but a good deal of it will not be shared - it was simply me listening to a family remembering their loved one. It was an afternoon and evening filled with sad and funny and amazing tales of a great man and his incredible family.

I guess the only way I can sum this up is to say that Mike, I'm sure, was very proud of his wife and family and all that they built together. I'm sure that somewhere, he still is proud, too, of all how far they've come since his passing.

My eternal thanks to Cindy, Stephanie and Michael for sharing so much with me - and for their support and encouragement with this project.